Isabella's Monologue: An Ichigo Kurosaki oneshot
by The Godess Freya
Summary: A girl finally realizes that Ichigo will never notice her. Little does she know that fate can be kind. **This is one of my first one-shots, so I posted it for sentimentality's sake. A Ichigo/OC pairing.


Why couldn't he ever see me? Even as I asked the question in my mind, i knew the answer. I was too ordinary. A man like Ichigo could never see someone like me. I had ordinary brown hair with ordinary brown eyes.I had a ordinary outfit with an ordinary body. I was neither too small nor to big. Even as I cast my eyes down at my work in front of me, I could feel myself asking why. This insane attraction to the orange haired boy in front of me was driving me insane slowly.

The bell rang for lunch and I quietly gathered my things. As people milled around me, the conversations flowed around the room, but nothing ever came my way. My Japanese was abysmal at best, yet I could speak the language well enough to converse. Even so, no one spoke to me unless it was out of pity. At first it hurt to be alone, but now I was comfortable with it....until the day Ichigo saved me from a hollow.

"Run, Izzy!" I couldn't do anything but clutch at my rapidly beating heart and watch as the creature with the white mask descended upon me. Fear clogged my throat as I saw it's jaws open and I tensed, waiting for the pain. When I heard a loud clash, I looked up to see Ichigo blocking the monster with a sword. However, he was dressed in a black robe, not his school clothes.

"Ichigo?"

"I said 'run!'" Ichigo reiterated.

"But what about-"

"Just go!" Even as he said this, he pushed the creatue away with his sword and sliced through the mask. To my astonishment, the monster began to dissolve. Instead of listening to Ichigo, I stayed with him. As he turned, I realized why I had felt like I had needed to stay. His chest sported a large gash, which was bleeding.

"Ichigo!" I breathed. "Let me-" He stopped me with his hand.

"You can see and hear me?" I could always hear you, Ichigo.

"Yes!" I said, taking a step closer to him. "And I can heal you. Please, just let me take care of you." I always had an affinity for wounded creatures, whether they be human or animal. It was the reason I was studying to become a doctor.

"Come with me," Ichigo said. He jumped away and I just stared. He ended up on the roof of the building next to me. In a rare moment, my old self surfaced, mumbling,

"How the fuck am I supposed to get up there?" Ichigo dissapeared then appeared next to me.

"You can't use shunpo?" I gave him a deadpan look, but quickly recovered.

"What is shunpo, Ichigo-san?" Ichigo shook his head, but turned.

"Get on my back." I blushed lightly. He gestured and I made my way over and climbed up on his back. "Hold on tight." The blush became fierce as I wrapped my arms around his neck. Ichigo jumped and I felt my stomach drop, causing me to tighten the loose hold on his neck. As Ichigo ran at high speeds, I forgot to be embarassed. Soon after our journey began, I started to relax and enjoy myself. Technically, I was jumping across rooftops. This took me to a higher level than even Spiderman could achieve. As we jumped off a particularly high building, I forgot about their deaths, threw my head back, and laughed, a pure sound of joy that I hadn't heard myself utter in years.

I shuffled out of the classroom, smiling faintly at the awhile afterwards, Ichigo had talked to me, and it made me feel wanted. But slowly, as the fights with hollows began to escalate, I was left behind. I wasn't called to heal him anymore. Orihime could easily surpass my abilities. Rukia also fought with him. She was there for him, like Chad and Uryuu. They could fight with Ichigo. They could protect Ichigo. And here I could do nothing but watch and pray for his safe return to school the next day. I was powerless, save for my healing abilities.

After learning about hollows from Kisuke Urahara, I ushered Ichigo into a room. He laid down and I knelt beside him. He opened his outfit to reveal the entire gash, but it also exposed his highly toned chest. I strugled not to blush and I leaned my head forward, letting my long hair cover my embarassment. I held out my hands and let them hover over his injury. I let out my breath slowly, letting my consciousness fade until I could feel the power thrumming in my veins. I felt it begin to vibrate, awakening at my call. I channeled my reiatsu to my hands and I felt the warm sensation as I began to heal Ichigo's injuries.

"When did you begin to see ghosts?" Ichigo asked quietly. I started, not expecting him to talk to me.

"Since I was born. My brother could see them as well, so we grew up together. My sister couldn't see them, though. She wasn't cursed like Ryan and I were."

"Cursed?" I shook my head, already revealing too much.

"We had powers," I said, changing the subject. "We grew up and learned how to distinguish between people and ghosts."

"What about hollows? Is this your first time seeing a hollow?" The simple question was like a fist to my gut. I lost the ability to breathe and tears instantly clouded my eyes. As one fell, I lowered my head more and tried to concentrate on my healing, hoping Ichigo didn't see the tear fall.

"No," I answered truthfully. I chose not to expound on my answer, even if it seemed rude. To my surprise, I felt Ichigo place his hand on my wrist.

"I'm sorry." As I started at the first human contact I'd had in years, I found myself slowly shaking my head. At his touch, I felt a gentle warmth invade me, almost like a healing salve. It had been so long since a human had reached out to me that I didn't know how to react. The green glow retracted from my hands and I slowly placed my hand over Ichigo's. I closed my eyes and took a breath, then released it.

"It's all right," I whispered. I looked up at the ceiling and faintly smiled. "They're all right." Ichigo didn't try to pry past my cryptic answer. He merely removed his hand and let me heal his injury.

As I exited the school, I looked up and nearly froze in my tracks. A hollow was above the school, and he seemed to be searching for something. My first thought was for Ichigo, who was in front of me. My gaze darted back to him, then back to the hollow. However, I stopped totally as I realized it was staring straight at me. For a few seconds, neither one of us moved as the sounds faded away. As it slowly grinned, I heard the conversation flowing around me and my eyes widened. I was in a public place where any of these high school students could become casualties.

Without conscious thought, I began to run, brushing shoulders with Kiego on my way out. I didn't even call out an apology, which was an oddity for me. My feet did the thinking for me as they ran to a deserted playground outside of the populated areas. I turned frantically, looking for the hollow. Responding to my panic, it landed in front of me with a loud scream. I cowered and then realized how much of an idiot I truly was. I had run from Ichigo and the people who could have killed the hollow with one swipe.

"The last one," it murmured, licking its lips. My head came up at the unexpected comment. As I studied the hollow, I realized in sudden clarity what the hollow meant. The markings on its legs along with the remnats of the peculiar broken mask on its face gave it away.

"You," I said, dropping to my knees. "You...killed them."

"You don't think you could hide from me forever, did you?" the hollow chuckled. "As much fun as the game as been, it has to come to an end." I stared dumbfounded by the creature. "Don't you want to meet your family?" it crooned as it made its way toward me. "They miss you." This time, the tears flowed down my face and I made no effort to hide them. "You killed them but didn't have the decency to pray for their souls." The words cut more than any blade could ever damage and I felt myself begin to hyperventilate. "You were too weak to do anything, but you couldn't even do a simple, menial task." Weak. I was weak. Even now, as I knew death was approaching, I sat in a crying heap on the sandy ground, unable to defend myself in the most primal way. I had no witty responses, no clever traps, no physical defense to use. I was useless. "You are useless," the hollow echoed. The chuckle that followed the statement showed the joy it was taking from my pain.

"She isn't useless." I jumped at the new voice behind me. I turned to see Ichigo, his sword held loosely in his right hand.

"I am..." I whispered. "My brother could fight....while I had to stand and watch."

"Like the day he died," the hollow yelled. "The day I ate him while you cried for him, you useless human!" Tired of talking, the hollow jumped at me, but again, Ichigo blocked it.

"Shut up!" he yelled at the hollow. He sliced, but the hollow jumped away in time. I began to shake and I wrapped my arms around myself.

"Useless, useless, useless!!!" The hollow taunted, launching itself at Ichigo. The orange haired teen dodged easily and cut off its leg. The hollow writhed and screamed in agony. As the screams of pain began to fade, they began to change, and I began to hear my brother dying all over again. My whole body shut down as I watched my brother's final moments. "You'll pay, you stupid human!" the hollow cried.

"FINE!!!!" I yelled. "KILL ME!!! YOU DON'T WANT HIM!!! I'M THE LAST OF MY FAMILY!!! NO ONE WILL MISS ME!!! SO GET IT DONE, YOU STUPID HOLLOW!!!" Following my outburst, there was silence, then the hollow's booming laughter.

"Finally a good decision, human! I will make you turn into a hollow!" As I heard his reaction, I stood and threw out my arms.

"Finish me, then," I said. "I'm waiting." With a barking laugh, the hollow bared his teeth and bolted past Ichigo, his eyes on me. "Let me die!" I whispered. As the hollow was mere feet away from me, I sighed in relief. I was going to see my family again.

I heard the sickening gush and I opened my eyes, prepared to smile once at Ichigo before dying. Yet as I opened my eyes, he stood in front of me, his sword dead center between the hollow's eyes.

"Why didn't you let me die?" I cried, pushing Ichigo.

"How could you ask me to let a friend die in front of me?" I simply stared at him.

"Friend?" He gave me a look that suggested I was insane before he nodded.

"Of course. You think I wasn't?"

"You never spoke to me. How could I think that?"

"You always acted like you wanted to be alone." I lowered my eyes in shame, and being the insightful person he was, he caught my gesture. "Why?" Because he knew parts of my story, I opted to tell the truth.

"How could I possibly have fun while my family is dead because of me? I couldn't save them because I was so pathetically useless!" As I cried, I felt the torrent of emotions I had bottled up spring forth and lodge in my heart. "Ryan and my parents fought that demon, but I couldn't do anything but watch because I can only heal!" My hands fisted and I shook my head. "How can I continue to go on alone?" I asked, my voice cracking. "I'm so tired, Ichigo." As if on cue, my cellphone rang and I laughed insanely. "Even now I can't leave." I grabbed the cell phone with shaking hands and read the number. Almost as quickly as my mood hand changed, I bottled everything back up and answered the phone.

"She's about dead!" I heard from the other line. "She's bleeding badly from multiple wounds! I need you to save her, please! I want my friend to live!"

"Where is she?" I asked quietly.

"At the Kurosaki clinic! She lives there." I felt a cold dread clutch my heart.

"I'm on my way," I said. That meant that it was either Yuzu or Karin on the brink of death. "Ichigo, take me to your home!" He looked taken aback. "If they called me, that means it's serious. Your family is in trouble." Like I had when I answered the phone, Ichigo went from emotions to serious in the blink of an eye. Without him even telling me, I jumped on his back and he took off, faster than he had before.

"What happened?" he asked.

"I don't know, but she's losing blood rapidly."

"Who? Yuzu or Karin?"

"I don't know, Ichigo, but I have to get there." You can't lose your family like I did. Your mother was hard enough on you.

"We're almost there." Almost subconsciously, I hugged him from behind and laid my head on the back of his neck.

"She'll be okay. I'll make sure of it." Because it's the only thing I can do for you. "I promise." With all of my heart.

As Ichigo made it back home, he jumped into his room. Amazingly, Ichigo, dressed in normal school clothes, was lounging on the bed. I jumped off as the Ichigo in black landed on his bed. The other Ichigo sat up, but the Ichigo in black literally melded into the other Ichigo's body. A small green circle popped out of Ichigo's mouth, and to my further amazement, he stuffed it into a teddy bear's mouth. After that, Ichigo - who I know to be the real Ichigo - grabbed my wrist and ran me downstairs. I heard clamor as I entered the room and Ichigo just pulled me into a room adjoining the living room. I opened the door to see a girl with short hair, her face pale as a sheet.

"Karin," Ichigo whispered. I took a breath, then gathered what little of myself I had left.

"Ichigo, I need you to leave." The look Ichigo shot me made me shiver, but I didn't back down. "Ichigo, you'll get in my way." I don't want you to see this.

"I want to stay with my sister," he demanded. Because I understood so well, I nearly folded. "Ichigo, she'll be fine." Please, leave. I want to remain your friend.

"I'm staying." Because I knew I was wasting time, I brushed past him and made my way over to his sister. I grabbed her wrist and felt the faint pulse of her blood as well as....reaitsu. Ichigo's sister could see ghosts as well, which was probably why she survived the attack. As I tore the blanket back, I assessed the damage and realized I would have to use my ultimate healing technique.

"Ichigo...." I trailed off as I moved to the side of his sister's head. "Trust me."Because I love you. Without conscious thought, he nodded. I leaned over and opened Karin's mouth with my finger. Much like giving CPR, i covered her mouth with my own and called on my truly odd technique. I breathed in with my nose and felt the reiatsu gathering in my lungs. I breathed out slowly, holding Karin's nose. The reiatsu in my lungs passed into her body and began to solidify at her solar plexus, forming a crystal. Once I was sure I had given her enough for a sufficient healing, I moved to her chest.

"What are you-"

"Trust me." I placed one hand on her chest and another on top of my hand. I interlaced my fingers and called on my powers. "Power Ward: Renew!" My fingers began to turn a ocean blue. "Release!" In one shock of power, the reiatsu build-up was released, the small condensed particles making their way to the wounds. As they dissapated, they began fusing the wounds together from the inside out, repairing the massive damage caused by the hollow. As the last of her injuries closed, I checked her body once more, healing all of the scars that my technique had missed. Once I was finished, I rose and swayed unsteadily on my feet. Fortunately, Ichigo was there to catch me.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?" Ichigo asked.

"For being weak."Because I'm not as good as Orihime. I can't compare.

"You are not weak," he denied.

"But everyone has to protect me! I can't fight and protect you or anything I love!" As soon as the words left my mouth, I realized that he would put two and two together, so I bolted. I ran out of his house, past the gaping father and sister, and into the streets. I ran and ran until I reached my house. I ran inside and locked the doors, sliding down the door until I was sitting on the ground.

"What a way to end your anniversary," I whispered. "This year...I'll pray for you." Not even moving, I folded my hands and sent up a prayer. "Please, forgive me. I wasn't strong enough to protect you. I wish you luck in the soul society. Have a good life and....wait for me. I can't leave just yet. I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?" This time, I yelped. Ichigo stood in front of me in full soul reaping regalia, his sword straped to his back.

"If you heard my prayer, you should know the answer," I countered.

"All day I've heard more from you than I have in years," Ichigo said, kneeling down in front of me. "I know that on this day, your family was killed. First, you get attacked by the hollow that killed your family, then you have to save someone from my family." In a surprise move, he grabbed my shoulders and pulled me into his chest. "I'm sorry that I couldn't protect you."

"But-" Why should you apologize?

"No. If I can't protect my friends, I have failed you." But you've done so much for me, Ichigo. I laid my hands on the arm snaked around me.

"You could never fail me," I whispered. At my fervent, not so subtle, declaration, his grip on me tightened. "I love you." In response, he cradled me to his chest and tipped my chin up to make eye contact with me.

"I'll protect you, Isabella. Always." In a soft gesture, he kissed my each of my eyelids. "Because I love you."


End file.
